Just in case

The World Does In-Fact Go To Heck

get yourself


Devices of Defense & Maimery

exempli gratia:Crescent Doom

Doubles as
trusty crutch
Crescent Doom
Preorder This Weapon

Tell the ended world to get out of your way or get chopped. If you hold this weapon and spin around and around in a circle, your ability to mow down attackers is limited only by your tolerance for dizziness. So if you were a pro ice skater pre-apocalypse, you’ll be fine.

Applications of use

slice, dice, chop, destroy

Crescent Doom
Details Details Details Details Details

Ah, but is one weapon enough?

You probably need more

Stock up: King of Spades with razor-sharp teeth Observe & Consider Paddle Oar Die striped for your maimery Observe & Consider In the Gutter avoid living eyeballs Observe & Consider



With all the doom-mongering in the world now-a-days, it's only natural to offer ones fellow fearers some real security. And why shouldn't it be in the form of a few beautifully designed blunt objects? Worst case scenario, heck breaks lose on Earth and one is forced to brandish a weapon, whatever is closest and bluntest at the time, and defend himself and loved ones at all cost. Best case scenario, the world stays as ‘lovely’ as it is now, the reason for the season disappears, and these objects of fearful beauty become an artistic reminder of the once-had fears of yesteryear.

These weapons should be displayed in easy-to-reach places of the home or work place until needed as life-saving-devices.

Devices of Defense & Maimery were designed by the doom-mongers of Fuzzco. Each piece is cut and formed by hand, made of red oak and carbon steel for rugged strength and beauty. We're doing our part to preserve life when it all goes down the tubes. See you on the battlefield, may the best man/woman/mutant win!



We'd love to hear from you. We'd love to hear from anybody really,
So long as they're of the living.